Daniel On Gay Latino/Hispanic Life

Name: Daniel
Age: 21
Gender: Male Ethnicity: Hispanic (Colombian)
Sexual Orientation: Gay
Birthplace: Texas

As a Latino/Hispanic, do you have a "coming out" story specific to your culture? Or do you have any stories describing why you feel you cannot "come out" as an LGBT Latino?
I don't think my coming out story was in any way different than anyone else because of my background. However I do feel that the reaction I got from my family was something I wasn't expecting. My father is 73 years old and my mother is 58 and they're both old school Colombians. Thankfully, I've only received love and support from my parents and immediate family since I came out to them.

Are you aware of any LGBT Latino/Hispanic celebrities or public figures, or can you name any that you know to be gay-friendly or pro-gay?
There's Juan Gabriel *famous Mexican singer* but I'm not sure if he ever OFFICIALLY came out or because he's very feminine people just came to that conclusion. His nickname is Juanga. I know of an openly gay Puerto Rican activist and a couple of fashion reporters on the Univision. But other than that I don't know of any others.

Who is your favorite Latino/Hispanic icon? Why?
Juanes. Apart from being an awesome musician, he fights for human rights and demonstrates his efforts through personal foundation work and his music.

How did you learn about sex and sexual orientation? Was it from family, friends, religion, etc?
When I was younger, I was naive to sexual orientations and sex. I remember liking a boy in the 3rd grade and felt that it was completely normal. And as far as sex goes, I learned about it from my older brother and his friends. My parents once tried to give me a sex talk, but it was AFTER I had already been sexually active.

What are your perceptions of what makes a gay man (top/bottom or other roles?) and a lesbian in Latino/Hispanic culture?
A gay man is simply a man who wants to be with another man sexually and emotionally. In the Hispanic culture, the stereotype is that if you're a girl and not so feminine you're automatically a lesbian and if you're a man thats not disgustingly macho *like most hispanic men* then you're automatically a "mariposa" or a butterfly. (nice way of saying fag)

Could you provide an experience where you were a victim of gay bashing/abuse from fellow Latinos vs. non-Hispanic people, whether you were "out" or not?
From my mother. Even though the statement she made was indirect and just a thought of hers *before she knew I was gay* she said when we were watching tv one night "I'm glad none of my children came out gay". To me that was worse than being beaten because these were words that were coming out of MY mothers mouth...someone who I adore and trust.

How did you learn about STDs and safe sex? Was it culturally specific through organizations or just through personal experiences?
I learned about STDs and safe sex in school and from my parents. My mom used to tell me "I don't want you to end up like we did, without guidance from our parents and having to find out things the hard way without notice." She, 9 times out of 10, will tell me that I need to always wear protection when having sex and if I tell her about a new guy I'm seeing, the first thing she'll ask is if I'm being safe.

If you are out to your family, describe how difficult/easy your "coming out" experience was. Was there any particular family member you felt most comfortable telling? Why? Was there someone you felt least comfortable telling? Why?
I first came out to my sister and brother because we can relate and get along very well. I was dreading coming out to my parents because I felt that they wouldn't be able to accept me, especially my father *retired military, 73 years old, catholic, COLOMBIAN haha*. At first it hurt him and he wanted me to seek "professional" help. But with time, he began to realize that it wasn't a phase or weird thoughts in my head. He's comfortable to the point of asking me if I'm the top or the bottom lol.

If you are actively involved in the larger gay community, do you, as a Latino/Hispanic, ever feel either objectified or discriminated against by others because of your race or ethnicity?
I don't get that feeling from the gay community. The feeling I do get is not being good enough because I'm not tall or thin lol. I'm not short or fat either but I'm not up to "gay standards". But as far as being objectified for my race/ethnicity, I only feel that when the person is ignorant enough to actually voice it to me. But other than that, being a gay, Colombian, 21 year old college student are just parts of what my dynamic, not entirely who I am as a person.

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